...because that is just how I roll.
First, the Christmas road trip extravaganza. I kept a bit of a log of my thought process throughout the trip, just to see if I really am as random and nonsensical as I had suspected. Turns out, I am more so than I suspected.
A brief log of topics as they passed in and out of my head (in the exact order they occurred, but without segue explanations): how nice energy drinks are, reasons why I have never lived near an ocean, how to remedy the situation, wondering whether men are also fascinated by shiny things, non-magical ways to make broomsticks or carpets fly (and thinking that carpets might be better for long-distance travel just because you could recline while traveling, though this in no way negates how awesome it would be to have a flying broomstick), the pros and cons of living in a Harry Potter world (cons: everyone else can do magic unless you are extremely unlucky and end up a muggle, there are rules, even though it would make you more powerful, jerks would be more powerful too... pros: you can do magic! pros win. obviously.), whether it would be advisable or inadvisable to dye my hair for no reason, how cool it looks when the landscape is all black-and-white until random color jumps in, bits of bad poetry, considering the pros and cons of being a secret government agent...
This list continues, but you get the gist.
Anyhow, after what I would like to consider minimal insanity, we arrived in Denver and then made the journey on to Whitefish. It was great seeing family and...family. My family has expanded and this was one of the first times that really hit home. It is cool and surreal.
So, New Year. I know that many or most people make themselves some new year's resolutions around this time. I am pretty anti-resolution because I hate deadlines (stick it to the...calendar) and I always thought that if I wanted to change something about myself I could start at anytime. However, I have been examining my life lately and I have found it to be exceedingly...average.
Please do not mistake my meaning. I have a lot in my life that is amazing and that I am so grateful for. I really have the coolest husband ever. We are both pretty healthy. I have a good job. I have good friends that technology allows me to stay in contact with. I have plenty to entertain myself with. I have two awesome families that are happy to include me. I also get to hang out with wonderful dogs whenever we visit said families.
The average part of my life is pretty much just me. I feel like I am very typical right now. Mediocre. Unremarkable. Just out of college. Not much money. Working in a job that, while admittedly is a good job, I really am not even a little passionate about. Mainly directionless. My goal up to now has been to keep myself from being bored instead of actually improving myself. That is the part that should change.
I have new goals I want to achieve. I am going to start the job of achieving them now. I have absolutely no concept of how long it will take me to finish them or if I will ever really finish, but I think doing something productive will make me feel a little less average (please, please, please). And, let's face it, no one wants to think that they are average. Fading away into some comfortable, safe, boring statistic has been one of my biggest fears, so it is time to take steps to avoid that. For now, the steps will be fairly realistic. I can't force Tyler to move to Prague until he finishes school.
Goals:
-Learn to play the guitar. I have tried to do this several times. I even took a class at college my freshman year. But I always learn a bit and then stop practicing and stop playing. I love music. I miss singing. And, while there is a definite possibility that I will find I cannot write any songs that do not sound like sad little junior-high poetry assignments, it would be awesome if I found out I could actually write and play decent music that I like. So I will learn to play the guitar.
-Learn Chinese. This is...well, really ambitious. But we have a Rosetta Stone Chinese program and we have been bouncing around the idea of heading to China for a while after Tyler finishes his master's. It could only be a good thing for me to speak the language, and I really like learning other languages. I will learn Chinese (or at least learn as much as I can on this program).
-Make more artwork. I miss my art classes so much and I am seldom happier than when I am working on a project I really love. I have not made anything since charcoal dylan that is hanging in our living room among the other dylans. I have everything I need, including time, and I really have no excuse not to be doing this. More art!
-Learn to cook more things. It's not that I completely suck at cooking, but I do not know a ton about it. I need to learn a lot of basic things. I have to look up specific recipes for everything and even then I often get intimidated. I need to cook more often. Then I won't be at risk of starving to death every time Tyler leaves town.
-Research what I want to do. I know I am not very (or at all) passionate about the job I am doing. I do not know what job I would be passionate about doing. I know some things I am interested in, but I do not know if they can be careers or if jobs even exist in some of the areas I care about. I think it is time to focus on what kind of job I want and see if I need to go to more school for it or just be more proactive about finding it. It's time to pick a direction. Well, to research what directions sound most appealing, really.
-Read. A lot. Lord knows I love to sit and watch tv shows and movies, but doing that all the time leads me to moments when I am afraid that my brain is going to atrophy to the point that it will resemble nasty, day-old tapioca that's been left out so it gets that gross pudding-skin. I am not trying to claim that everything I read will be literary genius, but I need to be reading something.
Please, please send me recommendations of things to read.
And advice about other goals.
And advice about how to pursue these goals. I have several friends who already are excellent at many of these things. Help me. I have no idea how long this fit of motivation will last.
Time to read.
Freedom, Hunger Games, or Pride, Prejudice and Zombies?
I am so reading Zombies.
12.14.2010
tripping, road-style. by which I mean I am taking a road trip...
...just so that's clear.
This fabulous two-week Christmas break will be marked by some serious road-tripping. When Tyler and I road-trip, we do not mess around. And by that I mean we don't stop. Ever. My road-trip bladder was highly conditioned in my youth to withstand trips across the state of Montana with nary a stop and for this I am eternally grateful. Not because Tyler is a stop-Nazi who veers into maniacal laughter as I beg for relief, but because it sucks to be the stereotypical girl on a road trip who has to pee every fifteen minutes. We stop for gas and gas only, barring any unfortunately-timed energy drinks.
The road-trip in question will be a journey from Pullman, Washington to Denver, Colorado to Whitefish, Montana back to Pullman, Washington. I find it likely to the point of certainty that we will do each of these drives in one day. Pullman to Denver. In one day. Denver to Whitefish. In one day. That is how we roll. And by that, I mostly mean that that is how Tyler rolls. The man can drive indefinitely. And does. He does these 18-hour drives by himself often and seemingly requires little distraction. Give the man a few cds and maybe some food and he is good to go. I also require a few cds but generally lose my mind somewhere around the five-hour mark. This provides some entertainment for my fellow trippers, but I phase in and out of reality once I pass this point of no return. One friend may recall me laughing hysterically at a sign for a historic tree nursery for about a half hour while continuously talking in a British accent that would horrify anyone who is even remotely fond of Britain.
Anyway, that doesn't really matter much because I won't really be driving much. I usually drive in about two-hour stretches with Tyler. I think this is due to three important factors. 1: Tyler feels safer when he drives unsafe stretches (ex. mountain passes, dark roads, winding roads, narrow roads, icy roads, wet roads, roads with wildlife or other drivers anywhere about, etc.). 2: I have the attention span of a head-injured goldfish. And 3: I am not a good driver. This is due largely to the attention-span thing. I get easily distracted by colorful things, shiny things, scenery, motion, or the subject I happen to be talking about at the time. It is also due to random bouts of superiority (displayed by driving almost exactly the speed limit and sadly shaking my heads at all the reckless drivers around me) followed immediately and at random by bouts of extreme and unwarrented aggression (displayed by yelling loudly at drivers anywhere near me, slower drivers, anyone changing lanes, or inanimate objects like stop signs). Apparently, schitzophrenic driving is a little nerve-wracking for passengers.
So we will do this drive. It will be fun. My job will consist mainly of driving briefly to make myself feel better, changing music, sleeping, retrieving food from the recesses of the car for Tyler, trying to entertain Tyler as he drives, and attempting to keep myself sane. I will spend long stretches staring at the scenery around us (this will not happen in Wyoming as the entire state looks the same for hours on end), going over in my head the entire plots of movies I have seen and books I have read, singing loudly to any music that is happening in the car (including all instrumental music), and coming up with ideas for books that I will never write.
I may attempt to get books on tape for this venture, but Tyler has begged me not to get any "girly" books. This is, no doubt, a reference to the fact that I like Jane Austen and he thinks her writing belongs only in convents. O well. I will find something manly.
I am currently debating what foods to bring. It will probably be whatever we have left in the apartment so...walnuts. Yep, that's pretty much it.
Look out, highways. Here we come.
This fabulous two-week Christmas break will be marked by some serious road-tripping. When Tyler and I road-trip, we do not mess around. And by that I mean we don't stop. Ever. My road-trip bladder was highly conditioned in my youth to withstand trips across the state of Montana with nary a stop and for this I am eternally grateful. Not because Tyler is a stop-Nazi who veers into maniacal laughter as I beg for relief, but because it sucks to be the stereotypical girl on a road trip who has to pee every fifteen minutes. We stop for gas and gas only, barring any unfortunately-timed energy drinks.
The road-trip in question will be a journey from Pullman, Washington to Denver, Colorado to Whitefish, Montana back to Pullman, Washington. I find it likely to the point of certainty that we will do each of these drives in one day. Pullman to Denver. In one day. Denver to Whitefish. In one day. That is how we roll. And by that, I mostly mean that that is how Tyler rolls. The man can drive indefinitely. And does. He does these 18-hour drives by himself often and seemingly requires little distraction. Give the man a few cds and maybe some food and he is good to go. I also require a few cds but generally lose my mind somewhere around the five-hour mark. This provides some entertainment for my fellow trippers, but I phase in and out of reality once I pass this point of no return. One friend may recall me laughing hysterically at a sign for a historic tree nursery for about a half hour while continuously talking in a British accent that would horrify anyone who is even remotely fond of Britain.
Anyway, that doesn't really matter much because I won't really be driving much. I usually drive in about two-hour stretches with Tyler. I think this is due to three important factors. 1: Tyler feels safer when he drives unsafe stretches (ex. mountain passes, dark roads, winding roads, narrow roads, icy roads, wet roads, roads with wildlife or other drivers anywhere about, etc.). 2: I have the attention span of a head-injured goldfish. And 3: I am not a good driver. This is due largely to the attention-span thing. I get easily distracted by colorful things, shiny things, scenery, motion, or the subject I happen to be talking about at the time. It is also due to random bouts of superiority (displayed by driving almost exactly the speed limit and sadly shaking my heads at all the reckless drivers around me) followed immediately and at random by bouts of extreme and unwarrented aggression (displayed by yelling loudly at drivers anywhere near me, slower drivers, anyone changing lanes, or inanimate objects like stop signs). Apparently, schitzophrenic driving is a little nerve-wracking for passengers.
So we will do this drive. It will be fun. My job will consist mainly of driving briefly to make myself feel better, changing music, sleeping, retrieving food from the recesses of the car for Tyler, trying to entertain Tyler as he drives, and attempting to keep myself sane. I will spend long stretches staring at the scenery around us (this will not happen in Wyoming as the entire state looks the same for hours on end), going over in my head the entire plots of movies I have seen and books I have read, singing loudly to any music that is happening in the car (including all instrumental music), and coming up with ideas for books that I will never write.
I may attempt to get books on tape for this venture, but Tyler has begged me not to get any "girly" books. This is, no doubt, a reference to the fact that I like Jane Austen and he thinks her writing belongs only in convents. O well. I will find something manly.
I am currently debating what foods to bring. It will probably be whatever we have left in the apartment so...walnuts. Yep, that's pretty much it.
Look out, highways. Here we come.
12.03.2010
And now for something completely different...
Up to this point in the land of blog (I refuse to use the term "blogosphere"), I have attempted to be humorous in all my stories for you, dear reader. I want to amuse you, make you laugh, and not turn this thing into some sort of cyber-journal for baring far more of my soul than any would ever care to know. I still promise to never descend into sickening junior high poetry ("no one understands me", "my life is a black abyss", "I am trapped in a circling vortex of black darkness that is o-so dark and black", etc.) but today I am introspective and I thought I would throw my introspection out there and see if anyone else is feeling it or if I am a melancholy ball of psychosis.
The main point of the aforementioned introspection is the feeling of being lost. I think lost is the wrong word. Maybe directionless? Rudderless? Adrift? I don't know. The real issue is that suddenly I don't have a next step. Prior to this point there has always been a next step. I will explain.
Elementary school comes before middle school. Middle school comes before high school. After high school, go to college. And after college...what? Well, ideally you get a job in your field. Sciencey people go into medicine or research or whatever else those sciencey people do. Teaching majors get teaching jobs. Political scientists go into law or politics or something. Theater majors...do theatery things. Peace studies majors go join a commune or a non-profit or a protest group or something. The real dilemma here is that even in majors that have a logical next step after school, people do different things. We pick up jobs in dental offices or schools or libraries or restaurants and we say it's just until we move on. But move on to what?
I don't have a next step. I don't have a goal. I have no clue what I want to do. I don't want to work in the dentist office forever even though it is a good job with good pay and nice people. I want to do what my major said I could, broad and beautiful concepts of changing the world and making a difference and saving little pieces of humanity wherever I find them. But even though I knew I wanted those broad, beautiful things, I never knew how I was going to achieve them. Do I move to an orphanage in Africa? Go teach in China? Head to Northern Ireland and try to make myself useful in some sort of community work? Go build houses in South America? Work in projects somewhere in the states? I have nothing. No leads. No answers. No clue.
I know this sounds a little self-pitying and I don't mean it to be that way. I mean even less to somehow blame others for not warning me that I would suddenly have no advisors or instructors. I knew college would end. I knew real life would happen. My lack of decision is my fault. But what to do? Reality hits hard. Do I want more school? Sure, I would probably enjoy that. But I have to know what I am going to school for. Do I want to work for some non-profit and feel like my life is making a difference? Absolutely. But I still have to pay my rent and insurance and buy food. In this economy, I am thankful that I have a job and it feels almost selfish to complain that it is not fulfilling, that I want more.
But I do.
I want to do something that will make me feel that even if I die tomorrow, I will have done something that matters. I want to leave work feeling fulfilled or accomplished even when I am drained and exhausted. I want to feel that sense of purpose, that drive, that motivation that I felt when I was in school: that I was working towards something.
And I really want to not be the only one who feels directionless and confused right now.
Sorry this was not amusing. I will amuse you later. Now to determine what kind of pizza I eat tonight.
The main point of the aforementioned introspection is the feeling of being lost. I think lost is the wrong word. Maybe directionless? Rudderless? Adrift? I don't know. The real issue is that suddenly I don't have a next step. Prior to this point there has always been a next step. I will explain.
Elementary school comes before middle school. Middle school comes before high school. After high school, go to college. And after college...what? Well, ideally you get a job in your field. Sciencey people go into medicine or research or whatever else those sciencey people do. Teaching majors get teaching jobs. Political scientists go into law or politics or something. Theater majors...do theatery things. Peace studies majors go join a commune or a non-profit or a protest group or something. The real dilemma here is that even in majors that have a logical next step after school, people do different things. We pick up jobs in dental offices or schools or libraries or restaurants and we say it's just until we move on. But move on to what?
I don't have a next step. I don't have a goal. I have no clue what I want to do. I don't want to work in the dentist office forever even though it is a good job with good pay and nice people. I want to do what my major said I could, broad and beautiful concepts of changing the world and making a difference and saving little pieces of humanity wherever I find them. But even though I knew I wanted those broad, beautiful things, I never knew how I was going to achieve them. Do I move to an orphanage in Africa? Go teach in China? Head to Northern Ireland and try to make myself useful in some sort of community work? Go build houses in South America? Work in projects somewhere in the states? I have nothing. No leads. No answers. No clue.
I know this sounds a little self-pitying and I don't mean it to be that way. I mean even less to somehow blame others for not warning me that I would suddenly have no advisors or instructors. I knew college would end. I knew real life would happen. My lack of decision is my fault. But what to do? Reality hits hard. Do I want more school? Sure, I would probably enjoy that. But I have to know what I am going to school for. Do I want to work for some non-profit and feel like my life is making a difference? Absolutely. But I still have to pay my rent and insurance and buy food. In this economy, I am thankful that I have a job and it feels almost selfish to complain that it is not fulfilling, that I want more.
But I do.
I want to do something that will make me feel that even if I die tomorrow, I will have done something that matters. I want to leave work feeling fulfilled or accomplished even when I am drained and exhausted. I want to feel that sense of purpose, that drive, that motivation that I felt when I was in school: that I was working towards something.
And I really want to not be the only one who feels directionless and confused right now.
Sorry this was not amusing. I will amuse you later. Now to determine what kind of pizza I eat tonight.
12.01.2010
Hugh Laurie is the eternal rocker of my world.
For those of you not given to the Laurie fever, let me give you a short list of reasons why you should be.
1) The man is a comic genius. Seriously. I know he plays tons of side characters, but he plays them enormously well. Also, he wrote and starred in two very British comedy shows, "A Bit of Fry and Laurie" and "Jeeves and Wooster". Both are brilliantly, well, British. In the very best possible sense.
2) House. The man is House. Yes, I know lots of people don't particularly like the show, think Dr. House is an ass, all of that. However, you absolutely cannot deny that the man can act. And for those of us that like the occasional dose of evil, sarcastic, aggressively anti-social humour, House is a wonderful chance to indulge ourselves.
3) The man is so good at his American accent for the show that tons of people don't even know he's British! INCLUDING THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER FOR THE SHOW!!! No, seriously. He called him just the kind of compelling American actor he had been looking for. I bet the rest of that conversation was interesting.
4) He plays like five instruments. Seriously. And apparently he is soon coming out with a blues/jazz album.
5) He is charming. Wait, just to me? Really? Moving on.
The last and most important reason to love the man is that he has written quite possibly the funniest book I have ever read. And I have read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which many apparently look to as the king book of random and strange humor. This beats it. No, really.
Hugh Laurie's book, The Gun Seller, is a wonderful spoof on spy thriller-type books. It is engaging and entertaining and made me want to keep reading, leading to many a groggy morning in the ol' dental office. In an attempt to convince you to read it, and an attempt to repeat things that made me laugh earlier, I will now give you snippets of the book.
"Swallows flitted here and there, darting in and out of the trees and bushes like furtive homosexuals, while the furtive homosexuals flitted here and there, pretty much like swallows."
"Rayner was uglier than a car park, with a big, hairless skull that dipped and bulged like a balloon full of spanners, and his flattened, fighter's nose, apparently drawn on his face by someone using their left hand, or perhaps even their left foot, spread out in a meandering, lopsided delta under the rough slab of his forehead. And God Almighty, what a forehead. Bricks, knives, bottles and reasoned arguments had, in their time, bounced harmlessly off this massive frontal plane."
"When the bar had cleared, I leant across to the fat man and gave him a speech. It was a dull speech, but even so, he listened very carefully, because I'd reached under the table and taken hold of his scrotum."
Look, all I am trying to say, really, is that you should read this book. Really. As in, immediately. Or sooner. It is magical and has made me actually laugh out loud. And I am not generally a laugh-out-louder to books.
There you go. Read the book. Grow in your Laurie love. Enjoy.
Off to do work.
1) The man is a comic genius. Seriously. I know he plays tons of side characters, but he plays them enormously well. Also, he wrote and starred in two very British comedy shows, "A Bit of Fry and Laurie" and "Jeeves and Wooster". Both are brilliantly, well, British. In the very best possible sense.
2) House. The man is House. Yes, I know lots of people don't particularly like the show, think Dr. House is an ass, all of that. However, you absolutely cannot deny that the man can act. And for those of us that like the occasional dose of evil, sarcastic, aggressively anti-social humour, House is a wonderful chance to indulge ourselves.
3) The man is so good at his American accent for the show that tons of people don't even know he's British! INCLUDING THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER FOR THE SHOW!!! No, seriously. He called him just the kind of compelling American actor he had been looking for. I bet the rest of that conversation was interesting.
4) He plays like five instruments. Seriously. And apparently he is soon coming out with a blues/jazz album.
5) He is charming. Wait, just to me? Really? Moving on.
The last and most important reason to love the man is that he has written quite possibly the funniest book I have ever read. And I have read Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which many apparently look to as the king book of random and strange humor. This beats it. No, really.
Hugh Laurie's book, The Gun Seller, is a wonderful spoof on spy thriller-type books. It is engaging and entertaining and made me want to keep reading, leading to many a groggy morning in the ol' dental office. In an attempt to convince you to read it, and an attempt to repeat things that made me laugh earlier, I will now give you snippets of the book.
"Swallows flitted here and there, darting in and out of the trees and bushes like furtive homosexuals, while the furtive homosexuals flitted here and there, pretty much like swallows."
"Rayner was uglier than a car park, with a big, hairless skull that dipped and bulged like a balloon full of spanners, and his flattened, fighter's nose, apparently drawn on his face by someone using their left hand, or perhaps even their left foot, spread out in a meandering, lopsided delta under the rough slab of his forehead. And God Almighty, what a forehead. Bricks, knives, bottles and reasoned arguments had, in their time, bounced harmlessly off this massive frontal plane."
"When the bar had cleared, I leant across to the fat man and gave him a speech. It was a dull speech, but even so, he listened very carefully, because I'd reached under the table and taken hold of his scrotum."
Look, all I am trying to say, really, is that you should read this book. Really. As in, immediately. Or sooner. It is magical and has made me actually laugh out loud. And I am not generally a laugh-out-louder to books.
There you go. Read the book. Grow in your Laurie love. Enjoy.
Off to do work.
11.01.2010
How to find a good book.
I think I am actually going to make two lists here. One will be the ways that a normal human being would find a good book to read. I do use some of these methods occasionally. The second will be how I find new books. I do this slightely more often than is normal.
List One: The Usual.
1) Read what the New York Times says is the best book to come out ever, what is selling most quickly this particular week or month, or what is most provocative (read: impossible to understand or thinly veiled political commentary). If you get whatever is selling most quickly at the moment, prepare yourself for the possibility that you will be immersed in horrible drivel that may take from you the desire to live. Preteens apparently buy more books than I had anticipated.
2) Read what Oprah tells you. I hear she likes good things occasionally. And sometimes she likes life stories that are not really life stories but pretend life stories about a life that was not actually lived but made for such a good book that apparently that does not really matter. Can't we just change the classification to "fiction" and move on? No? O... ok.
3) Read what is put out on the front tables at Borders or Barnes and Noble. Some of them must be interesting. You would think. I mean, they are placed in the coveted table position.
4) Read books recommended by friends, family, and random strangers that look like they have good taste in books.
5) Read books recommended to you by a love interest so you can appear compatible even in your taste in literature. It will just add to the overwhelming evidence that you are meant to be together.
List Two: The Unusual or Things I Do
1) Go onto the public library's catalog online. Begin to type in random words that you are vaguely interested in, liked at some point, or sound amusing ("penguin", "new zealand", "the modern rap movement"). Read through the list of books that pop up and write down the titles of any that sound potentially entertaining. Go forth and read them.
2) Walk aimlessly up and down rows of shelves, pulling out and examining any book with a brightely colored or otherwise eye-catching cover. The most highly visible books must be the best ones, right? Be sure to wander through the non-fiction section too! How else are you going to find the ultimate guide to fanfiction?
3) Close your eyes, spin, and point in a direction. Walk in that direction until you come in contact with a shelf. Browse shelf.
4) Grab a stack of books. Use as giant dominoes. Check out whatever you can grab before the librarian throws you out for "misuse of reading material".
5) Find the authors whose last names are closest to your own last name. Read their books. All of them.
6) Move on to authors closest to your first name. It's fun! And the books only suck about half the time.
7) Take books off the library's return cart. If someone just checked them out they must be good.
8) Explore the nooks and corners of the library for books that enterprising folk might have left there.
*Fun activity! Hide books throughout the library in random nooks and corners. They will serve as a pleasant surprise to folk who explore random nooks and corners and this will keep the librarians on their toes.
**Also of note: librarians do not appear overly fond of this fun activity.
Well, you now have two lists! Go forth, my highly-literate minions, and read!
List One: The Usual.
1) Read what the New York Times says is the best book to come out ever, what is selling most quickly this particular week or month, or what is most provocative (read: impossible to understand or thinly veiled political commentary). If you get whatever is selling most quickly at the moment, prepare yourself for the possibility that you will be immersed in horrible drivel that may take from you the desire to live. Preteens apparently buy more books than I had anticipated.
2) Read what Oprah tells you. I hear she likes good things occasionally. And sometimes she likes life stories that are not really life stories but pretend life stories about a life that was not actually lived but made for such a good book that apparently that does not really matter. Can't we just change the classification to "fiction" and move on? No? O... ok.
3) Read what is put out on the front tables at Borders or Barnes and Noble. Some of them must be interesting. You would think. I mean, they are placed in the coveted table position.
4) Read books recommended by friends, family, and random strangers that look like they have good taste in books.
5) Read books recommended to you by a love interest so you can appear compatible even in your taste in literature. It will just add to the overwhelming evidence that you are meant to be together.
List Two: The Unusual or Things I Do
1) Go onto the public library's catalog online. Begin to type in random words that you are vaguely interested in, liked at some point, or sound amusing ("penguin", "new zealand", "the modern rap movement"). Read through the list of books that pop up and write down the titles of any that sound potentially entertaining. Go forth and read them.
2) Walk aimlessly up and down rows of shelves, pulling out and examining any book with a brightely colored or otherwise eye-catching cover. The most highly visible books must be the best ones, right? Be sure to wander through the non-fiction section too! How else are you going to find the ultimate guide to fanfiction?
3) Close your eyes, spin, and point in a direction. Walk in that direction until you come in contact with a shelf. Browse shelf.
4) Grab a stack of books. Use as giant dominoes. Check out whatever you can grab before the librarian throws you out for "misuse of reading material".
5) Find the authors whose last names are closest to your own last name. Read their books. All of them.
6) Move on to authors closest to your first name. It's fun! And the books only suck about half the time.
7) Take books off the library's return cart. If someone just checked them out they must be good.
8) Explore the nooks and corners of the library for books that enterprising folk might have left there.
*Fun activity! Hide books throughout the library in random nooks and corners. They will serve as a pleasant surprise to folk who explore random nooks and corners and this will keep the librarians on their toes.
**Also of note: librarians do not appear overly fond of this fun activity.
Well, you now have two lists! Go forth, my highly-literate minions, and read!
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